Many people experience this – in school, in their jobs or any type of social situation.
Truth be told, being the black sheep has followed me my entire life. Actually, I have lost count of all the times I was looked upon as odd or even crazy.
If you fit this description, worry not. In this post, I will share with you what I found to work 90% of the times I felt like a misfit.
Keep reading.
Just because you don’t fit in SOMEWHERE, does not mean you don’t fit in ANYWHERE
First thing you need to do is stop over judging yourself for being different.
That’s totally okay.
Just because you don’t fit in in a certain social context does not make you an outcast. It’s just that you haven’t found the right social circle for you just yet.
The planet has 7 billion inhabitants. Is it so ludicrous to think that there are other people with a character just like yours?
Of course not.
As lonely or misunderstood as you may feel, I guarantee you there are people out there who share the same ideas as you do.
And the good thing about this digital age we live in – you can literally go online as we speak and meet tons of new people.
Or, if you are as old fashioned as I am, go out and talk to people. Chat up the bartender, the taxi driver, a random girl.
Or, if you want a safer bet – ask your current friends to introduce you to new people.
There are more people out there just like you than you can imagine.
Turn your misfit into a form of expression
In my opinion, the greatest pain from not fitting in comes from the inability to express yourself fully in that particular social context.
You can quote me on that one.
So what you need to do is find a form of expression of what dwells inside of you.
For example, I express myself by writing these blog posts. I express ideas that resonate within me and I share them with people.
It makes me feel good.
Find an activity that allows you to express the beliefs you are unable to express in your daily life.
Start doing music, join a gym, do volunteer work. Whatever it may be.
Express yourself FULLY and it will be the medicine your misfit soul needs.
You might not be the misfit you think yourself to be
Ask yourself, am I really not fitting in here or am I just making conclusions based on a few scattered interactions?
Do I know these people well enough to conclude that I don’t fit in?
What I learned is that many people are not that different from you than you might think.
My advice is to dig a little deeper and what you will find out is that you are not such a weirdo after all.
Sometimes people like to put facades in social situations to portray the self-image they desire.
But that might not necessarily be the real them. I’ve met TONS of people like this, who ended up being good friends of mine.
If you try to look beyond external facades, you will see that a lot of people actually share the same traits as you do. It just might be that you are not as fake as they are.
Look at things objectively
Okay, so you tried to dig a little deeper, but you find out that there is a huge disconnect between you and them.
Now what?
Sometimes you need to see these challenges as an opportunity to grow.
Instead of shying away because you don’t fit in, ask yourself ‘What am I supposed to learn here?’.
If you answer this objectively, you have probably identified a weakness within you and a chance to rectify it through that social circle.
Remember, every experience we have on this earth serves the purpose of making us stronger.
It might just be that you are just too shy of a person and you need to loosen up a little.
Or it could be that you are way too aggressive in your behavior and you need to take it easier.
Whatever it is, look at it objectively, recognize it as an opportunity to better yourself and act on it.
Stay true to your mission
Alright, we now have now come to the pinnacle of our discussion.
Here it goes:
Whether you want to make an effort to fit in or not, remember to ALWAYS stay true to your mission.
That is the most important thing.
What a lot of people tend to do when they don’t fit in is degrade their character.
Sometimes change is good, don’t get me wrong, but a lot of people tend to take it to an extreme.
Some people go to such unbelievable lengths just to fit in, that in the end, they become unrecognizable.
They even forsake their goals and dreams just because they want to be liked.
Don’t be that guy.
Just think of prominent historical figures such as Mandela, Martin Luther King and Gandhi.
Do you think they fit in anywhere?
Far from it. They were the very definition of outcasts. Some of them were even considered criminal offenders.
But they had millions of admirers who shared their philosophy, nonetheless. Because they stayed true to their mission.
Talking time is over, now is time for doing.
Go out there and turn your misfit into your greatest blessing.
Missed something? Or have more tips or feedback?
Let me know down below!
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